Thursday, September 01, 2005

thou shalt know thy spouse: Hum Tumhare Hain Sanam

A. Girl and boy (boy 1) have known each other since childhood.
B. Girl has also been friends with an orphaned boy (boy 2) her family sort of adopted, him taking on a brother-type role, although not actually her brother, as she already has a brother, who is needed as a plot device at some future point, so we can't pretend he isn't there.
Therefore, does it follow that it girl knows boy 1 and girl knows boy 2, boy 1 and boy 2 probably know each other? Or, if not, boy 1 and boy 2 are aware of each other and the other's relationship with girl? It does follow, at least a little, right? At least enough that the existence of boy 2 and the basic nature of his relationship with girl are not a surprise to boy 1, and boy 2 is aware of the basic character of boy 1.

A. Girl is Indian and lives in India.
B. Boy 1 is Indian and lives in India and is some sort of big-shot business dude who is sorta rude to his secretaries.
C. India is a patriarchal society with a knot of horrible issues about women's rights, male possessiveness, subservience in relationships, etc. [Disclaimer: no particular offence to India - so are lots of places, including where I live.]
D. Girl marries boy 1, who has loved her since childhood.
E. Girl continues a very close, time-consuming relationship wtih boy 2.
Therefore, does it follow that girl should be surprised by husband (boy 1)'s confusion/hurt/jealousy over what at worst looks like an affair and at best is surely an insensitive distribution of emotional resources? NO. Of course not. But it we stuck to logic 101, we wouldn't have ourselves this rather pointless and unentertaining movie.

The best part is the girl's brother, who is obsessed with Amitab Bachchan, which is just sort of funny. Oh and the surprsie cameo by Aishwarya. That was good, despite her indicating that her character is blind by staring like a zombie and not moving her head or neck. Maybe that part was actually played by an Aishwarya fembot. And oh my goodness the clothes they have put on Salman Khan. Fugly beyond all good sense and almost in violation of the laws of nature - although, to be fair, whenever did lame and pleather obey the laws of nature? Shudder.

Aside to Salman: clothes back on. Now. All of them. Prefereably different ones, but whatever the costume designer gave you to wear, just wear all of it and stop preening. You are a very silly man.

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